so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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