problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
