Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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