You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I will die if light touches me.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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