Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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