I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
where am i from again
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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