We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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