And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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