He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
