I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
