Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize