Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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