these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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