i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize