You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
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