i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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