So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
