I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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