nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
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could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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