You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
