I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
