thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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