I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
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