dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
