Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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