Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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