pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize