My hair reeks of homosexuality.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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