just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
