Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
if i can run in heels then i can drive
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
