Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
