We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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