How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
