So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
