Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize