laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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