Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
