I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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