Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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