I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize