Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
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But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
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plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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