you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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