A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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