Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
