69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
