If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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