don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Let's get the cat blown out
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
