just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
