Slut skills are useful in every country.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
