After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
