Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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