matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
i think we sleep fucked last night...
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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